Is Duncan Bannatyne seriously weighing up a move to Tamil Nadu, given the fact that his young wife lives in the UK and he gets withdrawal symptoms when they’re apart? And would Britt Ekland, a woman who refers to herself in the third person, ever set up home in a country where nobody recognises her? “The heat,” said Paul Chuckle helplessly on more than one occasion, and who could blame him when the film crew had chosen to send the celebrities to southern India at the height of summer. Nobody wants a self-catering break with someone who has a mini-nervous breakdown after offering to cook dinner, so John Altman is out.
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